Movie Review: Ghostbusters

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I haven’t done a movie review in ages (well, if you don’t count my Star Wars non-review), bit it kinda feels like this was required for various reasons – not least how divisive the film seemed to be before it released, like some kind of Hollywood Brexit.
Anyway, Ghostbusters is, for better or worse, a remake of the 1984 movie of the same name. A gender-swapped remake, but nonetheless a remake, hitting pretty much all the same plot points from slightly different angles. And that in itself is going to put some people off, but on the basis that J J Abrams managed to remake the original Star Wars and have it be awesome, it’s gotta be worth a look, right?

And actually, as the film started, I was pleasantly surprised. I liked all the Ghostbusters – the writers didn’t just give us Pete, Ray, Egon and Winston with boobs, they gave us… new characters. Fun, intelligent, witty, kick-ass chicks – and that’s what I wanted. I want my 10 year old daughter to see that not only can a woman be a scientist, but she can be a scientist and be hella cool at the same time. I suppose it’s kind of sad that this paragraph needs to exist, or that the whole gender-swap thing was such a big issue, but there we go, it’s out there now, and as far as I’m concerned girls can definitely grow up to be Ghostbusters.

Men, on the other hand, cannot be receptionists. And at the risk of sounding sexist, Kevin is where the whole gender-swap thing fell apart. Yeah, he’s the dumb blonde just there for eye-candy, but for me his dumbness was just too dumb; he was comedy stupid in a way that didn’t really fit alongside the Ghostbusters. This is me seeing it as a man, of course, so maybe I’m wrong, but wouldn’t it have made a better message if Kevin had at least had a couple of brain cells to rub together to show that actually, yes, you can be a pretty cool guy but do a traditionally ‘female’ job like be a receptionist. I mean, Janine was bored and snippy at work sometimes, but you never got the feeling her head was totally empty.

There’s a goat on the loose.

But enough about him, let’s talk about the ghosts. Ghosts is a fairly broad term as far as the Ghostbusters franchise is concerned; in the original movies there are ghosts of dead people, and entities from another dimension who have god-like powers in our own, and a similar mix applies here. Only, more so, because CGI has advanced 30 years in the interim, so we get a lot more weird and wonderful spectral entities zipping around New York when the Twinkie reached critical mass.

No, wait, the Twinkie was in the original. Never mind.

On the subject of Twinkies and the original movie: the cameos and callbacks. I guess it’s a thin line when remaking a cult classic with a following of its own, but for me I think they just tipped it over the edge a little. I can’t quite put my finger on why; maybe Bill Murray’s extended cameo was a bit too much without really adding anything of substance, or maybe having Janine turn round as if to say ‘surprise!’ rendered it completely unsurprising, or more likely the apparently bolted-on-as-an-afterthought appearance of Sigourney Weaver was just too hideously unsubtle for words. Oh, and Ozzy’s cameo? That should have stayed on the cutting room floor.

That said, Aykroyd and Hudson’s cameos were great; as were some of the more subtle references to the original, tucked away in the dialogue for Ghostheads and Easter Egg hunters to geek out over later. Even the appearance of Mr Stay Puft, and the unlikely means of his demise, were quite satisfying.

Being a bit of a petrolhead, of course, I would have liked a cameo by the original and iconic Ecto-1, or something like it (if there was one, I missed it!); the reboot Ectomobile was simply not in the same league – but then, they would have had to pull something pretty awesome out of the bag to top the original.

ectominiUnfortunately though, the slightly bland car and over-cooked fanservice were not the worst things about this movie. While it all started off good and fun and an interesting take on a classic, once the ‘big bad’ made his final play, it all went downhill rapidly.

Spoiler alert

I can live with Rowan hanging a lantern on the obvious wire work. I can almost live with him possessing the entire NYPD and making them strike a pose, although that was a missed opportunity for a Thriller flash-mob to end all flash-mobs. But to turn into a crappy cartoon of the Ghostbusters logo, which then grows into an angry kid in a romper suit trampling on his train set… No. I wasn’t on board for that, or the Slimer family hijacking Ecto-1 so it could become a nuke and save New York. Or, in fact, the portal jumping final scene that was lifted straight out of the climax of Big Hero 6.

Bottom line: I would have preferred a sequel, or even a reboot that took more of a diversion from the original. But it is what it is, and while it could have been more, at least half of it was a good fun flick – and even the ending I didn’t like was no worse than the end of Ghostbusters 2, which I suppose is a plus… But the new team were fun, and I could bear to watch a sequel with these Ghostbusters, especially if it took their story off in a completely original direction.

Overall: it’s not terrible. Not terrible at all.

Book Review: Ready Player One by Ernest Cline


This had been on my tbr list for ages, but I held off actually reading until this year because I didn’t want it to influence The Ballad of Matthew Smith or The Ambivalence Chronicles. Now I’ve finished it, it was definitely worth the wait.

By 2044 the world as we know it has crumbled into a poverty stricken dystopia, where the poor live crammed into the stacks – cheap tower blocks formed out of dozens of trailers – while the only really rich people seem to be those behind the OASIS – the free-to-use virtual multiverse into which most people choose to escape at every opportunity.

Ready Player One is the story of Wade ‘Parzival’ Watts, an orphan from the Oklahoma Stacks, who is obsessed with finding the ultimate Easter Egg: control of the OASIS, and it’s creator’s massive fortune, which is promised to the first person to can solve a series of riddles hidden within the OASIS.

It being 2044, and the riddler (James Halliday) having died in his 60s a few years prior, the riddles are based on 1980s pop culture – which pretty much makes it a book written specifically for me. OK, Dungeons and Dragons and the TRS-80 were not really part of my childhood, but Pac-Man, War Games, Monty Python, Blade Runner… there’s even a cameo appearance by a ZX80. What’s not to love?

Unless, of course, all these 80s references are just crammed into 400 pages with no thought for such incidentals as plot or characters. Luckily, that’s not the case; once Parzival solves the first clue, he is suddenly thrust into the public eye – and the eye of corporate behemoth Innovative Online Industries, which wants to win the hunt, take control of the OASIS, and promptly remove ‘free-to-use’ from its list of selling points. From there the stakes only get higher, as Parzival faces challenges real and virtual on his quest, competing against the corporate might of IOI, fellow gunters (notably Art3mis, a blogger he has long admired from afar) and his best friend Aech.

Once the hunt really starts the story rattles along at a good pace, but even before that, the massive info-dumps in the early chapters are sufficiently well-written and interesting that I felt no need to skip ahead.

There are no real twists in the plot, although there is a fairly decent kink towards the end which I enjoyed. My main criticism of the story would be that the final act seemed rushed, and lacked the tension I would have expected in such circumstances.

Even so, this is easily one of my favourite novels ever now, and a serious competitor for the Book I Most Wish I Had Written.

If you’re a gamer, or if you remember the 80s, this is well worth a look. If you’re both, and haven’t read it yet, well, you know what to do…

Camp NaNoWriMo, or A Hiatus Ending

I guess I’ve been away from this a while longer than I intended, judging by the hundreds of comments I had to delete when logging in to my blog. If you have left a comment in the last couple of months but it hasn’t been approved or replied to, I apologise, I may have been suffering from spam-blindness – although I think it’s more likely I was just suffering from spam. Please don’t let that stop you from commenting again.

Anyway, March is over, April has stopped pranking us and is getting on with the business of being a real month, bringing with it the spring session of Camp NaNoWriMo.

I have several projects bouncing around at various stages in planning, writing, or revising – none of which are making the progress I would like at the moment – and settling on something to be my Camp NaNo project proved to be an impossible task; so I didn’t. And, not for the first time, my goal for Camp NaNoWriMo this month will be simply to write, revise, plan or otherwise work on my writing career, such as it is. One of the ‘otherwise’ things was to start spring-cleaning my web presence to better suit my wider plans – hence logging in here and having to fight my way through that deluge of spam.

So Camp NaNoWriMo this month will consist of finishing a short story I’ve been playing around with, revising the forever delayed Ambivalence Chronicles, and planning an entry for the Writers of the Future contest. As well as messing about here, of course.

In the longer term, regular blogging may not fit in with all this other writing I want to do, but there will hopefully be occasional updates during April as these other projects advance.

Shorter snippets and updates will be posted as I write/edit them at, or

Superfluous Star Wars post #1138

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Did you hear they’re making a new Star Wars movie? Well, I’m not going to review it, because, face it, it’s been almost a month, you’ve either seen it or have no interest in doing so, and nothing I can say will change that. Even so, I’m going to throw my thoughts out here for anyone who may be interested in them; if you have not seen the film, consider this your spoiler warning.

Spoiler alert
So, to deal with the elephant in the room: yes, it is A New Hope: The JJ Abrams 3D Remix. The droid searching for its master on a desert planet, the retired hero, the Death Star, even the ‘Darth Vader Moment’; they’re all here. But it’s all ok, because Han Solo just goes right ahead and hangs a lantern on it:

How do we blow it up? There’s always a way to do that.

And you know what? I’m ok with that. It’s like the franchise is saying ‘forget those nasty prequels. The Star Wars you know and love is back now’.

And it is too – the wrecked Star Destroyer and miscellaneous other debris of the collapsed Empire made for a brilliantly post-Episode VI universe.

A lot seems to have happened in the 30-odd years since Return of the Jedi: Luke Skywalker has gone from lone Jedi to Jedi instructor to legend who may or may not have actually existed; while on the Dark Side, Supreme Leader Snoke has sprung up from who-knows-where, raised up the First Order, and armed it with an even bigger, even more powerful, but just as flawed, Death Star On Steroids.

The analogy to the rise of Nazi Germany post World War One is not entirely subtle, especially not in visual terms.

It’s a less black and white galaxy now; there are three sides, for a start, the Republic, the First Order, and the Resistance, which presumably has formed because the Republic is ineffective at resisting the Order itself. And Kylo Ren? Well, I’m not quite sure he’s the bad boy he wants the galaxy to think he is really.

And of course, this being just the start of a whole reborn franchise, fandom has plenty to debate in the meantime: Who is Rey? Who is Snoke? What’s the point of the Republic? And why the hell didn’t Han shoot first?

Looking back, looking forward


The year is well under way now, but it’s still January enough to do the annual taking stock of successes, failures and plans.

Well last year’s plans were:
1. Publish three more books; and
2. Enter the Writers of the Future contest at least once.

Well the failures column is looking good so far anyway. Let’s take a closer look:


The Countless as the Stars e-book went wide, although I haven’t added links here to the many other places it is now available. Bad marketer!

Last year’s secret project, which briefly became Bootlesquith Manor, was finally released as The Ballad of Matthew Smith, the title I wrote it under several NaNos ago.

I had also planned to release Bit#1 of The Ambivalence Chronicles, but Matthew Smith (which exists in the same multiverse but is not – currently – connected to the main story) ended up taking its place and becoming the one out of three that got published. Oh well.

For 2016 I will publish Bit#1, hopefully followed by Bit#2, and at least one other book. The plan is for these all to be rather more polished than Matthew Smith, which was just a bit of a fun side project really.


Last year’s new writing actually turned out to be quite sparse, with most of my limited time spent revising Matthew Smith and the Ambivalence Chronicles.

The Ambivalence Chronicles will be the ongoing project for 2016; I’m also currently doodling away on two or three shorts stories (although most of the ideas seem to end up demanding more words than I have space for) and planning to compile and expand the Re-Dwarf blogs into a sort of theological meander through the Red Dwarf universe.


See above for last year’s editing – quite successful in that it got done.

I still have several NaNoWriMo projects from the last few years lurking on hard drives in NaNo or first draft form, at least once of which will be subject to some proper revision during 2016.

Coming soon…

Next book release will be Bit#1 of The Ambivalence Chronicles – tentatively titled Tyrannosaurus Hex, although I may shorten it. Or not. I don’t know. I will also write more short stories, and send them places – not least Writers of the Future. Watch this space, as they say.
And for now, I should be writing…

Bootlesquith Manor, NaNoWriMo, and Ambivalence

Well, it’s been a busy couple of weeks here at, um… well, I feel like I should call my office Bootlesquith Manor or something now. Anyway, it’s been a busy time, getting a new ebook ready and published and starting to make people aware of it…

Yes, the project formerly known as Bootlesquith Manor is now available, under its proper title, The Ballad of Matthew Smith. This was my 2012 NaNoWriMo novel, tidied up over the last year in between other projects and now released into the wild.

This has been a labour of love for me, just something I wrote as a bit of fun, and not a work of world-changing literature, so where possible I’ve made it free – the exception being amazon, where you are invited to report it as cheaper elsewhere – all the links are on the sidebar.

There’s a lot I could have done with the story, a lot of ideas that got cut, including some philosophical meanderings about the nature of the house, Frank and Matthew’s different worldviews, and there was a whole bit about Matthew being his own grandfather that was both fun and brilliant, but never got expanded upon and was completely cut from the published version. Ged Williams’ storyline never really felt complete, and Bryonetta Bootlesquith too is a much better character in my head than she appears in the story. I could, circumstances allowing, build the existing story into a full novel – a Director’s Cut, if you like – and put some of those ideas back in; however, I suspect it will remain as it is, warts and all. Bryonetta, however… she may well find her way into The Ambivalence Chronicles at some stage.

The Ambivalence Chronicles is among those ‘other projects’, a comic fantasy/sci-fi epic I’m planning as 8 short novellas, the first of which I have been promising to release this autumn. Which is to say, now (ish).

And given that it is now November, this leaves me in something of a dilemma: to NaNo, or not to NaNo? Can I possibly come up with 50,000 new words at the same time as getting Ambivalence Bit#1 ebook ready and holding down a day job?

Well, clearly not, and to attempt it would be crazy. So, my NaNo challenge this month is to get Bit#1 ready and released (an interesting challenge in itself, since it doesn’t even have a title at this point!), and – to make it sufficiently challenging – get Bit#2 to a state of completeness so that only final edits are needed prior to release early in 2016.

Looks like a couple more busy weeks then!

Game Review: Back to the Future Part II


You’ve probably seen Back to the Future mentioned on the internet quite a bit of late, and as I had a few minutes to spare after rewatching Jaws 18 in readiness for the sequel, I fired up my hover-converted Spectrum in an effort to find out who this Scott person is, and what’s so Great about him.

The Facts

Back to the Future Part II was released by Image Works in 1990 as a tie-in with the movie of the same name; as is the nature of movie tie-in games, it has a somewhat tenuous link to the film. It will work just as well on 48k and 128k machines; but it’s a big game, requiring several multi-loads even on a 128k Spectrum. For this review I have been mostly playing on my 128k Spectrum +2.

The Game

What we have here is effectively five mini-games, ostensibly set in the various time zones used in the film – the present day (1985), the temporal nexus of 1955, and the incredibly futuristic October 2015 – each representing a key scene from the movie.

Level 1 is a hoverboard chase through Hill Valley – and I’m here to tell you that hoverboarding is not as easy as it looks, especially while having a fight with some 21st century goon or trying to avoid Old Biff (who will take you down with that cane of his if you get close enough).

Along the way you can pick up plutonium and other random goodies to replenish some of the energy you lose trying to fight off Griff and his minions. It’s kind of a variation on the Paperboy theme, only with a hoverboard instead of a BMX, and punching bad guys instead of delivering papers. And you thought Back to the Future was a wholesome family movie!

It’s a single long level but with a few save points along the way, so after a bit of practice you reach the courthouse, get Griff arrested, save Marty Junior and move on to level two…
Which I found immensely confusing; in theory it’s a puzzle game based (loosely) on some kind of automatic door system the film-makers think homes might have in 2015. You have to figure out how to open these doors in combination in order to lead Jennifer safely out of the house without meeting her future family, all the while battling the colour clash which makes it nigh on impossible to even see the characters at times, never mind figuring out which is which. Colourful, but mind-bending (and not always in a good way)!

Level three sees us safely back in 1985 – but it’s gone wrong! We’re in an alternate timeline where Hill Valley has become the set of a pants beat-‘em-up, and the only way to fix it is to mash keys wildly whenever someone approaches and hope you manage to, well, beat ‘em up.

Seriously, I know Marty never really got violent in the films, but this level could have done with some decent combat moves. On the plus side, the background music is nicely atmospheric, the graphics are nice, and I’m pretty sure I recognised the alternate Strickland, which is impressive. Also, the bad guys’ bullets seem to pass right through Marty, just as if he isn’t there – which he won’t be if he doesn’t get back to 1955 and sort this mess out!

level5Which is of course done by means of a sliding block type puzzle game in level 4. It’s colourful, animated, and accompanied by a jolly little tune that may or may not have been Johnny B. Goode; a good little game if you like that sort of thing, and a break from the action sequences either way.

But level 5 gets straight back into it, with another hoverboard chase through Hill Valley, this time with 1955 style set dressing. And it seems like even more bad guys out to beat you up, which makes the whole thing a little too long and difficult for my liking – I wish I could figure out how to get a tow from a passing car!

Sound & Vision

The artwork throughout is very good, with recognisable landmarks like the Texaco star and Café 80s in level one, the Lyon Estates lyons in level three, and some nice old-timey cars in level five. Scrolling on the hoverboard levels is smooth and features a few nice little animations like Marty’s foot pushing off as he hoverboards along, and the recognisably hunched figure of Old Biff.

The 128k version makes good use of the enhanced sound capabilities, with a rather good rendition of the main theme accompanying level one and a variety of other suitable tunes throughout the game.bttf

Retro Appeal

The game does make some effort to follow the plot of the film – no small feat for the film concerned – which definitely adds to the retro appeal.

Back to the Future Part II is not a bad game overall, if you can get your brain around the puzzle sections. If I had a time machine though, I’d go back and ask them to do something better with alternate 1985 than that awful beat-‘em-up level…

Another month passes…

…and another month with no updates here. But! I have been working even harder at finally getting Bootlesquith Manor out of the door. So hard, in fact, that I decided it was time to give it its official title and artwork.

Yes, that is a rather primitive cover knocked up on canva, but it actually does the job surprisingly well. You can find out more about The Ballad of Matthew Smith at

Also happening recently:


It has been a month heavy in edits: the final final touches to The Ballad of Matthew Smith are almost done of course, and Bit #1 of The Ambivalence Chronicles will be following soon after.


NaNoWriMo is on my mind, naturally; I’m thinking I’ll enter, but whether I win or not will largely depend on how well the final edit of Ambivalence #1 goes. On the plus side that’s a much shorter work than Matthew Smith, but getting it out during November (which is my self-imposed deadline) will still be a challenge! My NaNo project may well end up being a ramshackle collection of shorter works, possibly including later Ambivalence stories, the children’s story inspired by my daughter, and some science-fictiony stories I’ve had rattling around in my brain for ages.

Website updates.

I’ve had for ages, but it’s been pretty much dormant since I moved the blog and everything else over here. But given that both The Ballad of Matthew Smith and The Ambivalence Chronicles are heavily influenced by my own particular breed of British humour, I thought a .uk domain would suit them. And so that’s where they are, primarily. There have been (and will continue to be) a few minor changes here to accommodate those works and other behind the scenes tweaks.

Coming soon…

The Ballad of Matthew Smith will be released on all ebook platforms by the end of October – a firm release date will be announced as soon as I’ve got all the files ready and checked over. Bit#1 of The Ambivalence Chronicles will be available during November – again, firm release dates to follow. And whatever comes from NaNo, will come from NaNo.

Obviously, with all this going on, expect blogging to be sporadic, although it is my plan to post roughly weekly updates during November.

But you know what they, the best laid plans of mice…

Re-Dwarf: Terrorform

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Red Dwarf V has some great comedy and some great sci-fi – sometimes both in the same episode. Terrorform, though, doesn’t really deliver.

It’s a half-decent concept – Rimmer and Kryten crash land on a psi-moon which then proceeds to mould itself around Rimmer’s mind – and there are a few amusing lines in there along the way (mainly, of course, at Rimmer’s expense) but for me the whole thing plays out as more of a fantasy tale than a sci-fi one. But then again, if that kind of science-light approach to sci-fi works for Doctor Who, why not for Red Dwarf?

So putting that objection aside… well, I still didn’t like it that much. Krytens system messages in the opening scenes are quite fun – words like ‘magenta’ and ‘taupe’ have probably not been used to such good effect before or since – but after that it was missing something, at least for my taste. Or maybe it just doesn’t stand up well alongside the rest of the series.

Anyway… Due to an inadequately explained but convenient side effect of the psi-moon, Rimmer has a physical presence on the moon – as do various aspects of his personality. Most of the good aspects, however, exist only in a graveyard, having been slain early in life by the dominant inner demon: self-loathing. An it is this monster of self-loathing that wants to kepp Rimmer in prison and do unspeakable unpleasantness to him, and from which the boys much rescue Rimmer and escape.

Annoyingly, Starbug has got stuck in the undergrowth near the Swamp of Despair (which sounds like something out of Pilgrim’s Progress), and the only way they can get enough lift to escape is my some completely over the top male bonding and getting into ‘kind of a four-way hug situation’in order to make Rimmer feel better about himself, thus weakening self-loathing monster’s grip. And then all his good traits rise from the grave dressed as the Lilac Musketeers and save the day, which is all rather silly really.

Come quickly, I think I’ve found a metaphor!

In defence of the story, it is an interesting and sometimes fun way of exploring the psyche of one of the characters, and in particular the very personal hell he creates for himself. I haven’t had time to compare Rimmer’s psi-moon to any kind of Biblical representation of Hell, but I think being left alone with nothing but your worst character traits for (presumably) a near infinite period of time would draw parallels somewhere. Even if not it could be quite an interesting compare & contrast (if you happen to be interested in that sort of thing, anyway).

There’s certainly a parallel to be drawn from the idea that all Rimmer needed to do in order to escape this version of hell was to believe that somebody loved him.

And I think that is a suitably positive note on which to close for now – but please, if anyone has thoughts on how the psi-moon compares to Hell (or anything else about the episode), do leave a comment!


This month, I have been mostly…

…working on Bootlesquith Manor, actually. And it’s now so desperately close to finished that I’m going to keep this short. So here’s a quick summary of what’s been going on and what you can expect to hear from me soon:


Nothing really new, although I have had a couple of reviews over at Indie Retro News recently (Splat! and Penetrator, for those who may be interested).


Bootlesquith Manor has been undergoing various levels of re-writing and editing for at least six months, but a real concerted effort (and actually finding a creative groove that works for me) over the last month have got it pretty close to finished; I am saying with some confidence that it will be released this month – watch this space!


The ongoing Ambivalence Chronicles, are still in mind, of course, but it is also fast approaching November. Current thinking is that I’ll be writing a children’s book for NaNoWriMo – partly for and inspired by my then-to-be-ten-year-old daughter. Should be interesting anyway…

Coming soon…

First, Bootlesquith Manor – or the story which will continue to go by that alias until I’m sure it’s ready for release into the wild. The plan is to follow it pretty quickly (before or during NaNoWriMo) with Bit#1 of The Ambivalence Chronicles. And I’ll be announcing a freebie soon for signing up to my mailing list, so go ahead and hit the button now if you want to be somewhere near the front of the queue for that.
And you may have noticed that in order to fit all this in, I’ve slowed down to blogging once a week (plus once a month or so at Indie Retro News and Christian Geek Central). I decided it was best to find a routine I can actually keep up with, so I can keep some fresh content coming out here without taking up too much of my book-producing time.
So, until next week…